MY BROTHER’S LEGACY TO ME –

MY BROTHER’S LEGACY TO ME –

This week my brother would have celebrated his 57^th birthday. He only made it to his 52^nd birthday. I shouldn’t say “only” but as a baby he developed an exceptionally large tumor on the base of his spine and wasn’t expected to live. These types of tumors were pretty rare and the treatment was to surgically remove them. Since my brother’s tumor was attached to his spine, that was impossible. The doctors had to come up with something else to keep him alive but they were not sure they could do that. The treatment the doctors decided upon was to put him on steroids, which they did and continued for a few years. Back then, steroids were the miracle drugs they are today but they did not know the long-term impacts their use had on a body, especially in children. My brother did not grow during this period of time but he was alive. Once he did start growing, he caught up and grew to 6’ tall. He probably would have been a bit taller if he hadn’t been on steroids for so long.

The treatments that he went through as a baby and toddler gave him another 50+ years of life. For that, I am grateful. The downside is that he struggled his entire life with back pain and other abnormal ailments and illnesses. There were treatments for most of these that worked (at least temporarily). Over the years, he and I had many deep conversations about everything including why he got sick with so many odd, rare, and incurable things that would (and did) eventually kill him.

He spent the last months of his life making sure that those he loved knew it. Since his passing, it has become a habit with me to tell and show the people that I love how I feel about them. What was once uncomfortable for me is now easy. This has improved my life and well-being beyond measure.

My hope for you is that you can learn from what we experienced and don’t wait until the end of your life to show those you love how you feel. Do it now! Say “I love you.” Give them a hug for “no reason.” Call or text them. Be present. The hard truth is that you never know when you will take your last breath so we should all make the most of those breaths we have remaining.