CHIVALRY –

CHIVALRY

Is chivalry dead? I hope not.

Historically, chivalry was a medieval system of knightly conduct where honor, bravery, courtesy, and loyalty were shown. More recently it has been seen as – what is now considered – an old-fashioned courtesy, such as opening doors and ensuring safety.

Personally, I enjoy having a door opened for me. Someone thinking of me in “that way” and showing me respect is wonderful. When I first started dating, boys/men held doors for girls/women, helped them with their chairs at the table, walked on the outside closer to the street, and treated women with reverence. Women’s Lib put a damper on that because women want to be treated equally and that includes opening our own doors and pulling out our own chairs. Some men ignored that part of Women’s Lib. Some men went all out and stopped doing anything chivalrous for a woman. And some men, the smart ones (LOL), asked the woman what she wanted.

My dads were chivalrous towards me – they didn’t let me carry heavy things (even once they were elderly and struggled to do it), they opened doors for me, etc. My partners, at the beginning of our relationships, were chivalrous. After a while, though, not so much.

Yes, I am an independent woman who can do things for herself. In some situations, however, it is really, really nice to be treated special and have a car door (or any other door) opened for you, or anything else that boys/men were taught to do to treat a girl/woman “properly”.

My story of chivalry (or lack thereof) with a famous person:

I lived in an area where a major motion picture was being filmed. One of the stars of this movie was already a big star and is now one of the highest grossing actors of all time. One day, I was following him into the building and he let the door close in my face. Even as a teen, I stood up for myself and said something along the lines of, “That was rude!” This mega-movie star spun around and couldn’t apologize enough for his behavior. From then on, every time I saw him, he was friendly and kind to me, going out of his way to make sure that he didn’t let a door close in my face again.